How does one determine the value of a person? This is a question that has been bugging me this week. Many of my coworkers and I have been receiving our annual reviews and discovering that we are not thought of very highly. The reviews themselves from one manager have been a joke. A girl was marked down on her review because “she didn’t smile enough.” This is the first in a long list of made up complaints from management considering my coworkers and I. While my review didn’t have any of the made up comments like so many others it did have the same sad end result. I received a $.06 raise. Last year nobody in the hospital received a raise because the management was switching to a new merit pay format. The idea told to us was that the harder we worked the better the raise. What we have seen so far is the harder we work the more we meet expectations and don’t make any more.
What hurt me the most is to not receive a raise, again. Then next year receive less than the rate of inflation. I brought that up. I said technically I’m making less than I was 2 years ago. I pointed out that I never call in and that I pick up shifts to help out. The only gain I would have made is a penny, $.01.
It’s at this time that I have to ask the question of why I stay. Some will say the benefits. The money from my check that is taken out to go into my 403b with the possibility it MIGHT be matched if the money is right. Maybe health insurance, that thing that I have never used and could not afford to use if I had to. Some people argue the steady paycheck and security. Currently I bring home about $600 every two weeks. My mortgage is about $500. I have no car payment, no internet, no cable television, or central air.
My entertainment center boast a Lead screen TV that needs four people to carry it out along with an attached VCR and PlayStation 2. I don’t have the luxury of ever watching Bluray. My laptop still has a CD drive.
To sum everything up I am not a rich man. I am not a well off man. Honestly I’m not a comfortable man. Regardless of my situation I have been able to save up some money. The up side is that I was able to put a semi popular book on Amazon last year. Finally I had an out. I had something to look forward to outside of my current place of employment. My audience was able to prove to me that writing for a living is a possibility. While my current employer has been busy making me and the rest of my department feel worthless my readers on Amazon told me otherwise.
The logical next step is to find out what my real value is. First I need to change who exactly is judging that. Currently the powers that be have their heads up their ass and make up bullshit numbers to justify not paying somebody more than they want to. The obvious move is to pitch them to the curb. A year ago I learned that 8000 people were willing to vote on me and hand over their money on something I wrote and asked for more. That was a big defining moment for me and with what is currently going on I am regretting not doing this earlier. My life will change as it should. I don’t see it getting any worse than it currently is. I have more to gain than I have to lose at this point. Time to jump into the rabbit hole.
Matthew Gilman can be contacted on his author facebook page.