We’re all in

As the clock approaches midnight, the embers glow in the neighbor’s fire, and the neighborhood cats roam the streets I sit here typing on my laptop contemplating how things may go for the unforeseeable future. Have you ever had a moment when doing the right thing might be the worst thing you could do?
My wife is currently pregnant with our second child. We have bills and some debt but we aren’t hurting with two incomes. I have a job that is comfortable and pays better than any that I previously have had. I have the best insurance that one can have in my state. And yet, there is the possibility I am risking it all.
For what reason, to what goal, would someone do such a thing? I have friends who are not as fortunate as me, who are at the mercy of people who do not respect them and treat them as expendable. Recently an email was sent out naming names and putting blame on people for things they didn’t even do, in one case they did what was appropriate and yet they were seen as a threat. I have been watching from the sidelines, taking notes and trying to figure out what to do with the information at hand. After that email, I made my own, a jerry Maguire moment, and sent it.
My nerves are shot, I didn’t tell my friends what I did, I can’t even tell them do to the fear that they might be viewed as having something to do with it. For twenty years I have watched as good people were treated like shit by people who didn’t know or respect them and I can not do it anymore. Who stands up for the little guy? Who says enough is enough? At what point do we finally see something good happen instead of the usual shit that drags us down every day?
I don’t know what will happen tomorrow when that email is opened and three months of information is looked over and dissected. I know at some point that I will be sitting in an office and be grilled for the information that was stated in that email. I will be asked for names and after what happened recently, I won’t give them. I’m tired of the little guy being tossed aside while a polished turd is moved up the line. Sometimes there are more important things in life than yourself and your own selfish needs. People need to know that there is hope and someone who will stand up when things are looking bad. Those that will be by your side when there is no one to listen.
At the moment I am scared out of my mind and yet, somehow, through all of the maybes, I also know things will turn out just fine. There is a big difference between my friends and I, I have the Union behind me. I don’t know how much of a difference that makes or if it will help with the situation at hand but its better than what my friends have and that is nothing. Absolutely nothing.
I have been where they are. That feeling of being abandoned with nowhere to go and no one to talk to. Sure, there is HR but god only knows how they will look at things. One could be playing dice and have a better idea what is happening. As I sit here wondering what will happen one phrase comes to mind, if the worst-case scenario happens at least I can die with some dignity knowing that I did something good instead of just watching as shit happened to someone else.
There are somethings that you can only go all the way in on.


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